First Placement
Jessica and her mom sit in a room bustling with people who have places to go and people to see. Their backs are pressed against windows, where occasionally the sun peeks out from behind a cloud and shines through to cast their shadows on the floor.
Every so often, Jessica tears her eyes away from the people walking past to glance at her mom with an expression that reads, “What do we do now? We’re ready!” This is what I imagine when I picture the moments leading up to
Jessica is moments away from meeting her first foster child, Darius, who she later went on to adopt.
“You’re sitting there, and everything is together and it’s just a matter of waiting,” Jessica says, sharing her experience. “We didn't know really what to expect and they showed up and then it comes together quickly. You have this little guy in your arms and life begins again.”
“And life just begins again” – The sentiment of that statement combined with Jessica’s ability to see the best in every situation, and to ensure that everyone else is aware of it as well. With a family of seven, it can be imagined that it’s not always easy.
Jessica’s Daily
Jessica has biological twin daughters in college, fosters four boys, and adopted Darius in August this year. Her large family was a choice, and it’s one that has led to as many laughs as it has challenges.
“It doesn't matter if it's the first placement or the fifteenth. It's still hard,” she pauses for a second, “and I don't think there's a way you can protect your heart, at least, certainly for our home. The challenging emotions are always there. It’s part of the process and it gets easier to manage with experience.” Those emotions include a lot of love and sweet memories as well, and in her five years of fostering, Jessica and her daughters have loved 16 kids in addition to Darius.
She describes days filled with waking up before everyone else to check emails and schedules, get herself ready, wake up the two oldest boys to help them get ready, and then assisting the other three boys. After everyone is all dressed and has brushed their teeth, Jessica drops the two oldest off at school and then the youngest three go to work with her.
There are basketball practices and games, grocery store runs (in which Jessica tells us her mother jokes about her buying numerous pounds of pears), times for homework, superhero movies, and playtime every day.
“With five boys that’s important,” she says about playtime, and then adds with a laugh, “it’s a busy day.”
Laughing & Embracing Unpredictability
“Somebody is going to say or do something that makes you go: “Okay, I shouldn’t take life so serious,” Jessica shares after telling us a funny story that involves a grocery store cashier and one of her boys, “ We really hold on to that mantra because some of their stories are hard, and the stuff they've been through is hard. We try to not take it so seriously and just let loose and live this crazy little life.’”
Why Choose This Journey?
When asked why she decided to foster, Jessica credits her experiences growing up with six siblings for sparking her desire to have a large family and her unconditional love for kids.
“There was the moment that we really realized that we were adopting Darius. And that was the hardest journey.
I didn't think I was going to make it through… then I remember when we got off the elevator for adoption day and everybody was there and you just thought, ‘Man, this is real.’… And the next day you realize it's all worth it. I remember saying to him ‘Okay. You are my forever.’
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